I’ve been having a pretty bad flare-up this weekend—lots of excess joint pain (in areas that don't bother me chronically), and skin allodynia. The worst of it is in my back, arms, and shoulders. I feel like the skin on my arms is sunburnt, or like I've got a bad, tender-to-the-touch rash all over the places near my joint pain. There's nothing there, of course. No redness, no welts. It just feels really terrible, like I've got shingles again.
I'm grateful that I don't have shingles (knock on wood!), and I just began my new gut reset for rheumatoid arthritis protocol. (After my flare-up began.) I know it will take at least a few days to start feeling better, and I'm looking forward to it.
Sophie wanted to have a “family day” where she and I do whatever we like today, in lieu of Father's Day. I can't help but feel a little (?) guilty that we now ignore father’s day with her dad, but Sophie really doesn't want to see him anymore since he's made so little of an effort to know her. (Especially since he moved away to Colorado without telling her.)
To be honest, I think a lot about messaging other people on Father's Day—those who have been kind to us and treated us better than my parents, but I usually chicken out. That's embarrassing to admit, as I feel so rude and ungrateful. At the same time, I'm paralyzed by anxiety.
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